And so it begins....

ABA process is in the works.  Below is some info on what exactly this is, but in short, a team will come to the house for observation and help strategize to reduce problematic behavior.  Many of you who know 'Milo personally may say, he's well behaved and well mannered.  I do not disagree, when we are out he does very well.  His social skills have improved so much and his interaction with people is great.  Other than making direct eye contact, he does well holding a conversation now.  But at home when there are things that he is struggling with or just challenging authority (as all kids do at times) it can lead to meltdowns, excitability, uncontrollable laughter or lack of focus.  As a parent, it can fell like YOUR under the microscope.  YOUR parenting skills are not up to par.  YOU need to learn how to control you kids from outsiders who don't even know you.  But it really isn't' about the parents, so you have to really not take it personally.  Trust me, I know I'm a good mom.  And part of being a good parent is knowing when to be vulnerable and allowing others to help.  Both my kids are respectful, polite, and well behaved, this I know.  This is not a decision I made lightly, there is a lot of commitment in this.   I have struggled for the last two years wondering if this is the right thing.  At this time, I feel it is. 

ABA RESOURCES: WHAT IS ABA?

What is ABA TherapyBehavior Analysis is the scientific study of behavior. Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) is the application of the principles of learning and motivation from Behavior Analysis, and the procedures and technology derived from those principles, to the solution of problems of social significance. Many decades of research have validated treatments based on ABA.

The Report of the MADSEC Autism Task Force (2000) provides a succinct description, put together by an independent body of experts:

Over the past 40 years, several thousand published research studies have documented the effectiveness of ABA across a wide range of:

    populations (children and adults with mental illness, developmental disabilities and learning disorders)
    interventionists (parents, teachers and staff)
    settings (schools, homes, institutions, group homes, hospitals and business offices), and
    behaviors (language; social, academic, leisure and functional life skills; aggression, selfinjury, oppositional and stereotyped behaviors)

Applied behavior analysis is the process of systematically applying interventions based upon the principles of learning theory to improve socially significant behaviors to a meaningful degree, and to demonstrate that the interventions employed are responsible for the improvement in behavior (Baer, Wolf & Risley, 1968; Sulzer-Azaroff & Mayer, 1991). **resource: CARD website**

Division sucks!

Well, not really, but it sure is hard trying to explain to a child with special needs. I am not a teacher, and just don't know how to explain the homework in a way 'Milo will understand sometimes. One afternoon we ended up getting frustrated with the homework and each other. Then I just feel horrible the I let it get the best of me. After our mini meltdowns I sat with him and told him I'm sorry that I couldn't explain it better to him. He said he was sorry he was having a hard time and I told him it wasn't his fault. We sat on the floor to take a break and gave hugs. Then he said he wanted to try again. So we set up at the table again and gave it another shot, and we push thru and got it done. When at first you don't succeed...

Holiday rush is in full swing!

I went to an Autism support group last Wed at CARD (Center for Autism and Related Disorders). The topic; Handling the Holidays.
Most of this information is basic whenever routines change. But with the busy rush of the holiday season, it's easy to forget to slow down and take that extra step with our kiddos on the spec.
Some of the tips include:

• Role play with your child to help him/her understand the social expectations ahead of time. (shaking hands, greeting, new people)
• Have a safe place and have a relaxing activity on hand. Maybe even create a secret code that your child can say so you know they need a quite place.
• Find a way for your child to contribute to the holiday (help decorate, frost cupcakes, set the table)
• Make sure their dietary needs are met.  Explain to a host that your child has specific needs when it comes to food and that you'll bring something for your child.     

Meltdowns can be caused by too many or rapid changes. Give your child time to process the changes to the routine or environment. If a meltdown happens try to use a calm soothing voice. Try not to overwhelm your child with lots of questions or offering lots of choices. Use fewer words to decrease confusion. Most of all, be patient! Easier said than done sometimes, I know! But these few tips can hopefully make the holiday season a bit less stressful.

"Brain Brain Medicine"

Taking his "brain brain" medicine. It's actually an Omega supplement that supports brain and visual function. I looked into it after my cousin said she gives a similar supplement to her son. The only one I could find has a strawberry flavor and smell to it. But 'Milo HATES strawberries. It took him the longest time to take without gagging. But he finally will take, even reminding me at times before he goes to bed. We use to give to him in the morning, but he refuses now and will only take at night. He will not touch it or let me place it in his mouth. He will only take if I put it on the counter and he picks it up with his mouth. But not before I place a glass of water ready for him to wash it down with. This is one of our rituals. Hey, whatever works.

Legos!

My son is Autistic and he LOVES Legos!  

I love them too 'cause they are great for those fine motor skills, sorting, and just plain fun :)

 

First we sort...

 Fine motor skills hard at work!  The thumb and index finger combo can be tricky for him... but he's getting there

 Mission complete!!  

Cool, a truck too!

Oh that face! <3

There's no such thing as throwing in the towel

I'm determined have a good day or even a so/so day, because I don't feel like I ever have a "bad" day; not to say there aren't bad moments in the day, but I won't let those moments rule the day!  That might sound very "turn that frown upside down", but my emotions are on overload as it is without some episode ruining the whole day :)  I must say though this morning was tough and I was just about in tears.  Scolding your kid first thing in the morning is pain-staking, gut-wrenching, and heart-breaking.  But time was running out and we had to get moving, even if it meant literally dragging 'Milo out of bed and guiding him through the hall to the restroom and then into the den to get dressed.  All the while he's yelling and crying and begging to go back to bed.  And trust me, I'm not waiting till the last minuted to get him up; I am in there by 6:15, starting to talk to him, gently nudging, persuading him to start getting up, even though school doesn't start till 8.  But time goes quickly in the morning and I have to get me and them ready, and if they aren't dressed by 7 it throws off everything.  But even after all that, and once we got to the den to get dressed he had calmed down enough to dress and start the day.  It's like a switch is flipped.  Like nothing happened.  All of a sudden, calm.  

No one said it was gonna be easy.

Make the Apps work for you!

Earlier this year at work, we all got mini iPad as an appreciation to all the employees.  Exciting 'cause I always wanted an iPad but just couldn't justify spending the money for something like that.  So a FREE one was so appreciated.  The boys of course were so excited because every stinkin' commercial on the kid channels promote App for iPads!  "Mom can you download this app?", but all the apps are games.  And of course those angry birds!  But they love it and even through it's OUR iPad, they don't spend a ton of time on it and if I'm going to be downloading apps I'm going to get some that are fun, useful, and use as motivation!  I found this Jurassic app that is great for motivating 'Milo, especially in the morning!  Once he's up and dressed he can check on his Dinos (one of his favorite things!)  He collects money from them, feeds, them, uncovers new amber for new dinos, and keeps them safe from the storm.  This is a good one for his hand/eye coordination and his motor skills.  He has to keep all the dinos in their cages for a 2min time limit and if he doesn't hit all the red dots before time runs out, the dinos escape.  But the longer you take, the more money

you get so you have to get it just in time.  It's a good little reward system.  I'd much rather reward for good behavior whenever possible.