Since the time change, E had been acting out. Like, really bad meltdowns... doesn't want to get up for school and would have to prompted thru the whole morning routine while kicking and screaming.... fun first thing in the morning, right? Then when it was time to go to daddy dinner, or daddy weekend, it was the same thing, kicking, screaming, crying. Or he would come home from school, didn't want to do homework, and when I would call to say hi he would not want to get on the phone and would say "I hate mommy!" Definitely not a job for sissies! He goes thru these periods once in a while. In the beginign when he'd say that it would hurt, but after a while I realized, he just doesn't know how to express what he's feeling and you grow a thick skin to get thru the rough spots. All in all tho he is a loving and and good kid, so I
On one particular Tuesday, E did this to his room.
Not sure why he was
upset because he won't tell me. Sometimes when it's a daddy day he doesn't want to go. He had a hard time in the
beginning, but then got used to it, but now and again he'll act out, and
this was one of those days. I took a different approach this time. Instead of making him clean it
up when he got home, I packed up all the toys from the floor (even the
chair). When he got home he was shocked to find it all gone. I told
him that he was disrespectful to his toys and our house and he will have
to earn his things back. After sulking in his bed, he got up and said
"I'm sorry mom. I want to earn my things back". Tears of joy, I made a
breakthrough! I learned very quickly not to say something you are not going to follow
thru with, so I choose my words carefully :) In the past I’ve told him,
if you don’t pick up you toys/books, I’m going to throw them away…
luckily he did! But there has been a few times we’ve had to throw away a
few toys because that’s what I said we’d do. So now I say I’m going to
take them away.
Since then his mood has been up and down, but nothing as bad as the room disaster. But last week he came home with homework that was new to him; division. He was having a really hard time understanding and I was having a hard time explaining to him in a way that he could understand. So I came up with another incentive. Wii time! I punched out circles and wrote 10 MIN on each one (I made 6, I knew D would want in too). I told him that when we were done with the homework, he could get a "token" for Wii time. And he started to calm down. Now here comes the other son, who was doing his homework on his own in his room. I told him he could earn one too when he was done. And before I knew it, we were all done with homework! I told them they could earn up to 3 a day, but to be careful because they can also be taken away. I also told them that if hey got up and got ready for school and cooperated, they would earn another. This one is really for E, he hates to get up in the morning, but I am letting both boys "earn" them. It was a miracle! E got up and got dressed and ready NO PROBLEM, and he got his "token". And after school they did their homework, earning another... so the each earned 3 and they got to play Wii. My mom saw the "tokens" and got me some plastic gold coins to use. I love how these little plastic chips are coming in so handy! And even on days where there is just not time for Wii, like soccer practice days, they can still earn them and use the for weekend play time. And it limits the time on the Wii too, so it's a win/win!It's been almost a week and so far so good. I'm so glad when I figure out something that works, and in this case for both kids. Whatever make life easier! :)
