The road ahead

During the evaluation on Wednesday it was suggested that ‘Milo’s pickiness to food was a behavior issue and not necessarily a sensory issue.  They said it may be a behavior he learned to get what he wants.  I have my doubts about that; parents usually know their kids best, but I am not oppose to trying techniques they suggest if it helps him overcome his food issues, whatever it may be.  This is the process I am most concerned about.  How will he react?  How much will they push him?  When will they know if they are right or wrong?  I know that kids react differently to different people, even differently when it’s mom or dad.  I am loving and caring, but strict.  I give hugs and kisses, but also discipline.  I know he is aware of right and wrong.  Just the other day ‘Milo’s teach said he was very disruptive in class.  Especially during singing practicing.  He said 'Milo was laughing and being very silly.  When I got home I told ‘Milo that I was not happy with his behavior in class.  I said when his is distracting that it keeps the other kids from focusing on their work and learning.  I told him he needed to write an apology letter to his teacher.  He did.  He wrote he was sorry for not behaving in class, and he gave the letter to the teacher the next day.  He came home that day and the teacher had said he had an EXCELLENT day.  He was very impressed with his behavior.  Things like this tell me that he is aware and can get thru the day exercising appropriate behavior.  I have no doubt that some of these issues are behavior… as I told the people we met with, afterall he is a 9 year old boy.  But I also want to give him the benefit of the doubt and I don’t make a practice of using Autism as an “excuse” for him to run a muck.  ‘Milo has great potential I know it.  I’ve seen it.  I am sure that some of these actions out of frustration happens so fast that before he’s realizes it he’s made a mess or starts to meltdown because he will say after, “I hate it when I’m crazy”.  And at those moments I tell him, “you’re not crazy.  You just need a better way to work out your frustration and learn to calm yourself”.
Thursday when I got home from work the first thing he asked was if he could check his dinos on the iPad.  My mom said, “you have to see his room”.  He had had time out and did not like that and proceeded to throw toys all over his room.  I told him that he would have clean his room and finish his homework before checking his dinos.  He did.  He also told grandma “I genuine apologize for not behaving”.  (smile)  Later that night I talked to him a bit about the meeting we had with CARD (which ‘Milo was required to attend) and I told him that people will be coming to the house to help us figure out a way to work thru those times he’s frustrated.    I told him that they would also be helping him to try new foods… he made a little face and I said this will be a good thing.  I told him it will be good for all of us so we can all learn to help him work thru times that make him upset or frustrated.  He smiled and said OK.  I’m expecting this is going to be a rough road.  The people we met with on Wednesday said it could very well get worse before it gets better because they expect him to be resistant to change.  I think that is the part that weighs on my heart the most, is that he may/will get upset.  I am trying to stay positive and hope this will not be as hard as I am making it out to be in my head.